First big bummer of the summer is Transformers: Age of Extinction. I was hugely disappointed, and I think you will be too. Honestly, the movie franchise has been going down hill since Sam Witwicky's mother ate a pot-laced brownie in the sequel. I didn't like that one, and although the third installment was slightly better, this one just didn't do it for me either. I really think that Michael Bay, the director, needs to cut his loses before the Transformers' legacy is ruined.
Huge problem number one: This movie is too long. It's almost three hours long!!!! It just keeps going and going and going. The fourth movie in the series starts off promising, but things quickly take a turn for the worst on the screen and with your patience level. There were many opportunities for the movie to end, but it didn't. At the two and a half hour mark, I was so done, but then yet another action scene began. I will say this, during the three hours, you will get tons of actions. The Autobots have a numerous amount of enemies this time, so the action never really lags, but it does get a bit monotonous.
Huge problem number two: Storyline. Storyline. Storyline. While the story sorta makes sense, it just doesn't flow very well. Set mainly in Paris, TX (where everyone who really lives there have thick accents and yet no one in the movie did, for once) and Hong Kong, the Autobots are now fugitives while a corporate CEO has created his own transformers using parts from Megatron in an effort to be the leading supplier of these new human controlled transformers. Meanwhile, prehistoric Transformers are trying collect Optimus Prime and take him back to their creator while helping the government who is in cahoots with this CEO to create these new transformers. There's so much more, but if I tell you anything else, I'll give too much away. And, if your head hurts trying to figure all of that out, just know you have three hours to sit there and do it.
Huge problem number three: The dialogue. There's no more Shia Lebouf, but I don't think he would have made it better. Funnier, but not better. FYI, it has many funny moments, so he wasn't even needed for that. Mark Wahlberg is a quirky engineer who finds Optimus Prime, and spends the entire movie trying to protect his daughter while helping giant robots because they really need some tiny little human's help. Stanley Tucci, John Goodman, and Kelsey Grammer are the other big stars in the movie, but unfortunately their experience can't help the horrible script. The dialogue is terrible. They were just saying things, mostly stupid things, just to be saying something. "I'm not here to help you save your daughter; you're here to help me save my girlfriend," is by far my favorite. I mean, they all say pointless things like that. But, when you're trying to fill three hours with a weak storyline, I guess that's what you have to write.
I really wanted to like this movie. I kept hoping it would get better, but sadly it didn't which sucks because I was really excited to watch it with my new movie buddy, E. Weezy (shout out to my Twin for allowing to borrow her boo). The first Transformers movie was the best one. They are honestly and truly going to make this franchise extinct if they don't pull it together in the next feature. Oh yes, they'll definitely be a fifth movie. yeah...
Thursday, June 26, 2014
Friday, June 20, 2014
Think Like A Man Too - Too Funny
Think Like A Man based on Steve Harvey's self-help book was an extremely entertaining movie. I laughed so hard, mostly at Kevin Hart, so I was very eager to see the sequel. Think Like a Man Too picks up in Vegas with the entire cast returning for the wedding of one of the couples in the group. Kevin Hart's character, Cedric, is the best man. He's determined to be the best best man ever, and through an awesome bachelor party in Vegas.
The women are determined to have an even better bachelorette party. The maid of honor has all types of Vegas activities planned, but first that have to get passed the none-too-thrilled future mother-in-law. All sorts of comical travesties occur for both the men and women. At one point, they end up in jail at the same damn time. During these events, all of the couples discover things about themselves or their relationships. For example: one of the men tries to come to terms with the possibility of being a father, one of the women gets her sexy back, and one of the men discover that maybe they are ready to settle down and get married too. These revelations are kinda cheesy, but I'll let 'em make it because the rest of the movie is just too funny to care.
Kevin Hart isn't the only funny man in the movie, but he is by far the funniest. That little man makes you laugh in darn near every scene that he opens his mouth. Bennet, played by Gary Owens, had me rolling. He and his fanny pack are so dorky that you can't do anything but laugh. The women had their moments especially when they were singing my all-time favorite dance song, "Poison". When I was cracking up at them, was wishing I could break out and dance on the table in Vegas with them. They all did a fantastic Job. I will say, I didn't really understand why LaLa Anthony was there as she was completely pointless and she's not a very good actress. But, neither is Terrence J. SN: I really need Terrence to eat a steak or something. He's just way too skinty. You know who isn't skinny and was looking very yummy? Mr. State Farm himself, Dennis Haysbert as Uncle Eddie. Uncle Eddie could get it...but I digress.
Think Like A Man Too is just as funny as the first. We lose the whole purpose of the original movie which was to teach women in a comical way how to use their brain differently when trying to cultivate a relationship. That all is thrown out of the window to simply tell a story. The story is good enough without all the lesson learning even though everyone does learn a lesson one way or the other. Go see this movie. It's great for all races and sexes. A good time will be had by all.
I move to Houston, TX tomorrow and will be working on Fridays again, so I may not be able to catch movies so early anymore, but when I do, I'll be here writing for you all, so stay tuned. Transformers is next week.
The women are determined to have an even better bachelorette party. The maid of honor has all types of Vegas activities planned, but first that have to get passed the none-too-thrilled future mother-in-law. All sorts of comical travesties occur for both the men and women. At one point, they end up in jail at the same damn time. During these events, all of the couples discover things about themselves or their relationships. For example: one of the men tries to come to terms with the possibility of being a father, one of the women gets her sexy back, and one of the men discover that maybe they are ready to settle down and get married too. These revelations are kinda cheesy, but I'll let 'em make it because the rest of the movie is just too funny to care.
Kevin Hart isn't the only funny man in the movie, but he is by far the funniest. That little man makes you laugh in darn near every scene that he opens his mouth. Bennet, played by Gary Owens, had me rolling. He and his fanny pack are so dorky that you can't do anything but laugh. The women had their moments especially when they were singing my all-time favorite dance song, "Poison". When I was cracking up at them, was wishing I could break out and dance on the table in Vegas with them. They all did a fantastic Job. I will say, I didn't really understand why LaLa Anthony was there as she was completely pointless and she's not a very good actress. But, neither is Terrence J. SN: I really need Terrence to eat a steak or something. He's just way too skinty. You know who isn't skinny and was looking very yummy? Mr. State Farm himself, Dennis Haysbert as Uncle Eddie. Uncle Eddie could get it...but I digress.
Think Like A Man Too is just as funny as the first. We lose the whole purpose of the original movie which was to teach women in a comical way how to use their brain differently when trying to cultivate a relationship. That all is thrown out of the window to simply tell a story. The story is good enough without all the lesson learning even though everyone does learn a lesson one way or the other. Go see this movie. It's great for all races and sexes. A good time will be had by all.
I move to Houston, TX tomorrow and will be working on Fridays again, so I may not be able to catch movies so early anymore, but when I do, I'll be here writing for you all, so stay tuned. Transformers is next week.
Friday, June 13, 2014
How to Train Your Dragon 2: 2 Cute
I was super excited to see How to Train Your Dragon 2 because the first one was super adorable. Well, the second one is super cute too. How to Train Your Dragon 2 picks up five years later. The dragons are companions to everyone in Berk, the Viking village high atop a mountain. Hiccup, the chief's son, goes on a journey of self-discovery after his father tells him he's ready to become chief. (SPOILER ALERT) Along the way, he finds his mother and tries to convince Drago, a dragon hunter, that dragons are friends and not to be feared. When he fails, a dragon war begins.
How to Train Your Dragon 2 has an all-star (mostly B-list) cast. Jay Baruchel reprises his roll as the voice of Hiccup, and so does Gerald Butler as Hiccup's father, Stoic, The Chief. America Ferrera is Hiccup's fearless girlfriend, Astrid. The twins are voiced by Kristen Wig and TJ Miller. Jonah Hill, Craig Ferguson, Christopher Mintz, Cate Blanchett, and the sexy Djimon Hounsou round out the cast.
The kids were very quiet throughout the entire movie, even during the sad parts, and they cheered and clapped at the end. So, I'd say the kids will be entertained, and there are enough adult jokes in the movie for you to get a chuckle. Some of the bigger dragons may be a little scary to very little ones, but other than that I think everyone in the family will enjoy it.
How to Train Your Dragon 2 has an all-star (mostly B-list) cast. Jay Baruchel reprises his roll as the voice of Hiccup, and so does Gerald Butler as Hiccup's father, Stoic, The Chief. America Ferrera is Hiccup's fearless girlfriend, Astrid. The twins are voiced by Kristen Wig and TJ Miller. Jonah Hill, Craig Ferguson, Christopher Mintz, Cate Blanchett, and the sexy Djimon Hounsou round out the cast.
The kids were very quiet throughout the entire movie, even during the sad parts, and they cheered and clapped at the end. So, I'd say the kids will be entertained, and there are enough adult jokes in the movie for you to get a chuckle. Some of the bigger dragons may be a little scary to very little ones, but other than that I think everyone in the family will enjoy it.
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