Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter - My kind of movie!

Historical fiction, vampires, blood, action...what more could a girl ask for in a movie?  Really, I think the only thing that was missing was the eye candy, but I'll get that tomorrow when I see Magic Mike.  Abraham Lincoln:  Vampire Hunter is a movie based off of the book by Seth Grahame-Smith with the same name.  The movie stars Benjamin Walker and other B and C-list actors and actresses.  It don't really care which list they reside as long as they put together a great movie, which they did.

I haven't read the book, but I plan to add it to my Kindle soon.  Incase you haven't read it either, you should.  It has become a cult classic.  This movie will too.  The movie follows Abraham Lincoln from a young boy who protects his black free-slave-friend unknowingly from a vampire slave trader.  This leads to his mother's death.  He continues to grow up with the thoughts of vengeance on his mind and has help in unlikely places.  We continue to follow his journey all the way through to his fateful trip to the theater all while hunting vampires.  And according to this story, the civil war not only has to do with slavery, but vampires wanting control of America.

What more can I say about this movie?  It was great!  I enjoyed it!  If you like Tim Burton movies, (he's a co-producer) then you will love this.  These vampires aren't Lestat like or even True Blood beautiful.  They are gritty and sinister!  Abraham Lincoln is honest and bad-ass swinging that ax better than Paul Bunyan ever did.  Need a change of pace from the big block-busters or kiddie movies? Go see this one.  Abraham Lincoln:  Vampire Hunter won't disappoint.

Brave - Not your regular princess movie

Snow White, Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Rapunzel, Ariel, Merida... .  We all know the classic princesses that Disney has now made famous, but Merida is a new one to most of us, and Pixar is trying to put a new Brave twist on your regular everyday princess.  We are all use to that girl who is in some sort of trouble due to some other evil witch, women, or creature only to be saved by some man.  Boy, this idea that is shoved into little girls' heads time and time again, has really screwed up majority of women who are weeding through men trying to find their savor or Prince Charming.  Brave does not tell that ridiculous tale.  It's more of a coming-of-age, mother/daughter teenage drama sort of story.

In short the movie is about a Scottish Princess named Merida who's parents have betrothed her to one of three other princes who can win an archery challenge.  Merida, doesn't like this idea and wants to  have more of a say in her life.  To change her mother's mind, she finds a witch with the help of willow wisp that will cast a spell to change her fate.  Something Merida didn't expect happens during the spell and now the only way to reverse it before impending doom, Merida and her mother, Elinor, have to work together, listen and trust each other.  While all of this goes on, the King has to keep the other princes and their families entertained.  He uses food, drinks, and tales of horrible giants bears to keep them occupied.  All while, Merida's young triplet brothers reek havoc around the castle.

The plot is a little mature for the intended audience, and there are definitely some scary/disturbing scenes in the movies especially at the beginning and end that could give the kids nightmares.  Kids under the age of 8 probably should stay home.  There aren't any cute song and dance to keep the younger kids involved which is good for most adults who may be dragged in to see this.  The triplets are cute and funny and Merida's message of female independence and strength nice, but this movie really doesn't play to the kids and I'm really not sure it's supposed to do so.  If I had to choose between Brave and Madagascar 3, M3 wins hands down.

Madagascar 3 - Afro Circus?

There's something so peaceful about watching a kids movie despite a theater full of them.  There's usually no violence, no cursing, nothing scary, no sex, etc.  Wholesome right?  Well if this was 1982, 1992, or maybe even 2002, that would be the case.  I now find children's movies less wholesome and peaceful than they use to be.  But that's just me.  Madagascar 3 had a few dark moments: a lady trying to chop off the lion's head and put it on her wall, a lemur in an inappropriate relationship with a bear, and a tiger who clearly is traumatized and has psychological issues.  Despite all of this and more, the movie was enjoyable by all.

Being the third in a series (there may be more after how it ended) of zoo animals trying to get back home to NY, you think what else could they possible do?  Well, this time, in their trek to get home, the zoo animals led by Alex the Lion, lie their way unto a circus train which has the potential to get them home.  That's right folks.  Let's teach the children to lie and deceive to get what they want.  But I digress.  There is a lot going on in the movie that no one seems to be disturbed by:  monkeys dressed as royalty gambling in Monte Carlo, a circus in shambles led be the traumatized tiger that likes to jump through teeny tiny hoops, a flying zebra and his afro circus, an italian speaking sea lion, a hippo and giraffe in love walking a tightrope; just to name a few.  Maybe I'm paying too much attention.  And be prepared for  your kid to walk around saying, "That's Bolshevik!"  Someone thought it was a smart idea to simulate cursing.  Remember, this is a wholesome kids movie.

Madagascar 3 is just as much fun to watch as the first two which isn't saying much.  It is VERY slow in MANY parts so be prepared to take to children to the restroom a lot or for them to get antsy, restless, and squirmy.  They only really seem to be entertained when there is music and singing very popular radio tunes.  Fireworks by Katy Perry is the biggest hit.  The kids sang along and danced in their seats while laughing at the screen.  This is the best part of the movie to me too.  And, even though I'm not easily offended, something about the Afro Circus didn't sit right with me, but the kids already knew the song from the commercials and sang along like it was song by Katy Perry.  At the end of the day, take  your kids.  They'll enjoy it.  If you don't have any kids, don't waste you money.

Prometheus - Wait for it, wait for it...

Prometheus is everything that I love in a movie.  Sci-fi, suspense, killer aliens, Idris Elba, Charlize Theron, and a surprise ending.  Yes! Yes! And Yes!!!  This movie isn't for everybody.  As we were leaving the theater there were grumblings from the women, but the men seem to really enjoy it.  I'm one of those rare women who love movies like this.  There was a lot going on, so I feel like I need to see it again, but I was captivated the whole time and was completely surprised by the ending.  You have to wait for the entire movie to end.  The screen will go black, you will start to pack up your things and then something wonderful happens:  a little more movie plays.  This is THE most important part of the movie to me, so DON'T LEAVE.  You have to see this if you are a Ridley Scott movie fan.

I don't want to give away too much so I'll give you a brief synopsis:  Two archeologist find paintings and carving all over the world showing these ancient people worshiping aliens.  These archeologist believe that the aliens are the actual creators of human life or engineers and believe that these aliens reside on a planet that is over 2 years away.  These two, who just so happen to be in a relationship,  also believe these aliens want to be found and are asking the couple to come find them.  Some extremely rich dying old man funds a trip to this far away planet and these scientist along with others set aboard the Prometheus to seek out these engineers and get the answers to life's questions.  Well, all kinds of trouble ensues once they land and discover this dome filled with some sort of slimy destructive alien life form.  There are other factors contributing to the trouble that the travelers on the Prometheus face starting with this android named David.  Keep your eyes on him.  He's got a separate agenda that I can't tell you about with out spoiling things for you.

Idris Elba is the captain of this ship named Janek.  He is rough, tough, caring, honorable, handsome, and and so damn sexy (if you know anything about me, you know that I am hopelessly in love with this man).  He is the reason I wanted to see this movie, and even though his role is a supporting one, I was glad that he was chosen to play this part.  I just don't think anyone else would have made a better Janek.  I could be a little biased.  Charlize Theron as Meredith Vickers is sent there by the funding company to oversee everything and make sure everyone does what they are supposed to do.  She's a bit of a bad ass who also has her own agenda for being on the Prometheus.

I definitely recommend this movie to anyone who likes killer aliens, stupid scientist, and sinister androids.  It will be added to my dvd collection for sure.  It's been a long time since I've seen a good sci-fi movie like this one.  They just don't make them like this anymore.  There wasn't any ridiculous unnecessary sex scene or over the top special affects.  It was as pure and wholesome as any sci-fi movie could be.  Ridley Scott did a great job with this one to me.  Go see it and stay until the end...the very end.

Snow White and the Huntsman - Not the Disney version

Who would have thunk that in 2012 we would have 2 different Snow White movies 75 years after Disney's Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs?  The first one starring Julia Roberts was for kids and was pretty bad.  It's just a blip on Julia's stellar movie radar.  We will always forgive her for Mirror Mirror every time we watch Richard Gere drive up in that limo holding those flowers with the opera playing in the background at the end of Pretty Woman.  The second movie starring Kristen Stewart, Charlize Theron, and Chris Hemsworth is so much more entertaining and enjoyable, but fun with bright colors, happy magical moments, and singing dwarfs with similar names, Snow White and the Huntsman is not.

This movie is a very dark artistic version of the german "Snow White" by The Brothers Grimm.  There are dwarfs (8 not 7); there are magical moments using dark magic, and that fairytale aspect is there, but it's not in your face with a sappy happy ending that you find at the end of all Disney movies.  It is pretty much the same story with a few difference so I don't really need to give you a brief synopsis, but I will say this isn't a movie about how love conquers all and how a man comes to the rescue to save a woman.  So if you are looking for a great romantical date movie, this ain't it.

Even though I'm not a fan of Kristen Stewart because I feel like she always looks and acts as if her dog died, she did a decent job in this movie.  She didn't have a lot of lines (thank goodness), but there was an intensity to her eyes that was necessary for some scenes or maybe she was constipated.  I can never tell with her.  I feel like she's had an acting coach or two since Twilight.  Maybe she gave Beyonce's coach a call.  Whomever she's using got her to open her mouth and speak clearly (a reason why I feel she used the same one as Bey); now if only he/she can get her to smile and it not look like the world is ending.  

Charlize Theron is the #1 reason why I wanted to see this movie.  She's one of my favorite actresses.  As much as it pains me to say this, she overacted just a tad bit.  She looked flawless doing it, but unlike Kristen, there was too much intensity, yelling, and melodrama.  There's nothing like a great death (this isn't a spoiler alert.  We all know the evil queen dies.), but it did seem a little forced.  It's really not that big of an issue and doesn't take away from the movie too much, but if your a Charlize fan, you may be a little disappointed...just a wee bit.  

The eye candy that is Chris Hemsworth (I REALLY MUST SEE THOR!) and the classicness of this movie is enough for me to say go see it.  I may even add it to my dvd collection.  Unless some super awesome indie film comes out in the next few months, I definitely see this moving receiving Academy Award nods for set design, costume, and make-up.  The artistry of this movie alone is fantastic and will be missed on the small screen, so don't miss out on seeing it at the cinema.  Oh, and leave the small kids at home.  This isn't the movie for them.

MIB3 - They should have stopped after the first one.

Will Smith is one of the biggest movies stars in the world.  Because of his money making ability, studios allow him to make movies no matter how good or bad.  Now, I'm not saying he makes a lot of bad movies.  I really can't think of a Will Smith movie I didn't enjoy even a little bit.  His worst one probably was Wild Wild West, and even that was sort of entertaining.  MIB3 falls into that category...sort of entertaining.  The Fresh Prince of Bel Air went over to the dark side with this one.  He usually makes kid friendly MIB movies, but this one has a lot of death, low level cursing, and a somewhat ominous subplot.  I definitely wouldn't bring anyone younger than 10 to this one.  There isn't a little song a dance to pep this one up.

As we know from the first two Men in Black movies, Agents K (played by Tommy Lee Jones) and J (Will Smith) go around and handle alien problems while trying to keep the fact that there ARE aliens from humans.  Even some of the most famous people in the world, according to these movies, are aliens like Michael Jackson, Elvis, and Lady Gaga.  MIB3 isn't any different.  A big, bad alien breaks out of jail on the moon, comes to earth only to go back in time to try and kill Agent K who jailed him and shot off his arm which will allow this horrible alien to come and take over earth in the present.  Agent J has to time travel back to spoil this aliens plans while learning some secrets about Agent K (Josh Brolin as a younger K) in the process.  Where do they come up with this stuff?

There were tons of pre-teens, teenagers, and adults in the audience.  I must say they were thoroughly entertained.  One man couldn't stop laughing those deep belly laughs that filled the theatre.  I, on the other hand, smiled at a couple of corny jokes, and lol'd once maybe twice, but that's about it.  There was a tearjerker moment towards then end, but I saw it coming a mile away.  The movie was cute to say the least, but not nearly as much fun as the first one.  There really weren't any new tricks to pull out of the bag to make it as interesting as the first one.  It'll do well at the box office with it being a long weekend, but I feel that it will simmer off not too much long after that.  This really should be the very LAST Men in Black movie.

You really see Will Smith's age in this movie.  He's no longer that goofy, big-earred kid from the 90's that we loved to watch on our tv screens and then later on the big screen.  He can't get away with these silly little antics anymore.  It's time to stick with the action-adventures and dramas that he does so well.    His original audience has grown up too, so I think we like to see him in more grown-up roles being a husband and parent like he and the majority of his audience is now.  Again, Men in Black 3 is sort of entertaining, and worth the $6 I spent going to the early matinee.  I don't think it's worth anymore than that.  Go see it if you must, or don't and just wait for it to come out on USA or FX during an MIB marathon.

You sank my BATTLESHIP...or did you?!?!

Remember that game we use to play back in the day with the little grey ships and red and white pegs?  Well, Battleship is based off of that game.  It's not nearly as cheesy as that commercial with the little boy saying, "You sank my battleship," and there are no white or red pegs, but it was extremely entertaining.  A feel good movie to say the least.

Without giving away too much, the movie is set on a naval base in Hawaii and after scientist send signals to an earth like planet, unwelcomed aliens show up reeking havoc on Hawaii and Asia during a naval mock war exercise between America and Japan.  I know that seems like a lot, but it's really not.  They have to explain a lot in a short amount of time, which is done pretty well.

I guess what makes this movie so interesting is that there really aren't any big name celebrities other than Liam Neison who's supporting role really could have been played by anyone.  True Blood fans will be happy to see Eric Northman (Alexander Skarsgard) in this movie.  He's not as sinister in this movie playing Commander Stone Hopper as he is in True Blood, but he is easy on the eyes.  There are some unlikely heroes.  The one the producers and director want to you to like the most is double amputee US Army Lieutenant Colonel Mick.  He's actually a real Army Lieutenant Colonel who has never acted before this movie.  You kinda give his acting a pass because of the fact that you realize that he really has lost his legs.  Oh, and how could I forget to mention Rhianna?  If you are expecting Ri Ri to be the sexy celebrity she likes to play on the red carpet, you can forget it.  She's pretty much a rough looking chic in a bad wig covered by a ball cap the entire movie.  She does a decent acting job throughout the movie probably because they kept her lines short.

(SPOILER ALERT!!!)  If I was to say anything negative about this movie, I would say that it goes from realistic to ridiculous towards the end.  The USS Missouri comes out of retirement along with some of it's old naval officers to help fight the aliens.  I literally wanted to yell out, "SERIOUSLY!"  Everything else was plausible until that point, but in the end you were ok with this unlikely turn of events because it all worked out for the best.

Go see Battleship at the theatre because the special effects and action won't be nearly as exciting and entertaining at home on the couch.  I'm not a fan of 3D, but I think this might even be good in 3D.  I enjoyed it; I don't know if it's add-to-the-dvd-collection worthy, but I'd watch it again if someone bought the ticket or if it was on tv.  Of the two action movies so far this early summer, I liked this one best.